So I have recently downloaded this amazing, amazing devotion for writers from COMPEL training and I have decided to do the writing prompts found at the end of every devotion in this blog. Just to shake off the writing block and start prepping up these rusty skills and keep the creative juices flowing again. Aim is to be a good steward of His gifts, so here we go.
Just to keep track of my progress, my posts will have the same title as the devotionals I found the writing prompts from.
“Moses raised another objection to God: “Master, please, I don’t talk well. I’ve never been good with words, neither before nor after you spoke to me. I stutter and stammer.”” Exodus 4:10 (MSG)
Like Moses in that passage, I have never been known to speak well. I express myself more eloquently in written words, but when it comes to public speaking, I have never been comfortable facing a crowd, let alone, speak in front of them.
When I was a student, I detested recitations (especially graded ones) and while I always strived to do good in them, it’s something I would not voluntarily do so. I don’t like people gawking at me while I speak and I was, still am, averse to the idea of hearing my own voice squeak and tremble due to nervousness.
I am an introvert, that’s my excuse. I am shy, have stage freight and I just don’t feel confident in front of everyone else. Just give me a pen and paper, never a mic, please.
However, weird as it may sound, while I don’t like speaking and expressing myself out loud to people, I secretly covet such gift or skill. I am always amazed by people who speak well onstage, who are articulate in their speech, who go up onstage and deliver a message like it’s a walk in the park.
Sometimes, I would allow myself to picture an alternate universe where I have the confidence to speak to a huge crowd and just touch or change lives. One of my secret fantasies is to be a motivational/inspirational speaker — one who opens her mouth and a multitude is left in awe.
It’s like a little girl dreaming to be Wonder Woman. I know.
But one day back in 2014, God called my bluff and gave me the mic.
When one of the pastoral ministry staff in church approached me and asked if I would be willing to share my legal knowledge to a group of single parents for a talk they were planning to do, I asked her literally “Me? Why?” And she asked me back, “Why not?” So I started to convince her that I knew of another lawyer in church who would be more suitable for the job. I mean, I could not embarrass myself or disappoint them if ever.
But she and the pastor who was leading the ministry had already prayed and discussed about it and she said that I was the obvious choice. No ifs, no buts. They won’t accept a No answer.
And just about right that moment I could actually hear the same thing God told Moses when he trying to dodge the responsibility God was telling him to do: “get going. I’ll be right there with you—with your mouth! I’ll be right there to teach you what to say.” (Exo. 4:12)
God was nudging me, “hey, take the challenge. I got your back. It will be amazing.” And He was not kidding. Through that talk I gave, I met single parent women in church and see how knowledge of the law could empower them in their journey as women and mothers. I was able to meet co-panelists who became friends eventually. I met women from all walks of life, who I would have not met even if we went to the same church, had it not been for that talk. Most of them did not even know that a law about single parents like them existed and that the state equips them with rights and privileges as a means to support and protect them legally.
My dream of speaking to a crowd and impacting them, to my surprise, came true.
And it simply happened because I obeyed and trusted God when He pushed me to do it.
God equips us in every task He asks us to do, so we need only to obey. Obedience is our job, the rest is God’s.
So there’s no excuse left to say, “but God, I can’t do that!”